My daughter told me recently that I should practise what I preach and follow my own advice to be calm. I think I try to do that most of the time but sometimes I don’t think anyone can step away from their own anger, disappointment and disgust and sometimes that’s not a bad thing. Some days though most humans just wake up angry, fed up, disappointed with work, friends and life in general so I’ve been having a think as to what are the good, positive things to do to clear the mind and focus on better stuff. I don’t always practise what I preach and I definitely don’t actually do all of these things I’m going to mention, I’d love to but I am only human and absolutely definitely NOT perfect. I regularly have times when I just want to shut myself away from everyone and everything, put on my pyjamas and eat cake 🙂
- My number 1 is shut myself away from the world, put on my pyjamas, curl up on the sofa, watch rubbish, mindless TV and eat cake
- Get the knitting out with a cuppa, watch rubbish mindless TV
- Get my sewing machine out and see what I can come up with, maybe a new bag or a cushion cover, maybe a made up skirt with no pattern (that I haven’t actually ever work yet!)
- Walk, I love walking, get an audiobook on and shut myself away from the world while I’m actually in it
- Read, I am so lucky where I live because when it’s good weather, take a flask of coffee, lay in the sun and read my book, usually nod off to sleep
- Do a bit of meditation, yes I do practise that preaching very often and it ALWAYS makes me feel better
- Cook, I do like cooking and I do cook but I’m pretty sure that having a baking fest with some music playing is a great mind clearer
- Meeting up with friends, this is a bit tougher for singletons because everyone seems too busy and for a singleton with epilepsy that doesn’t drink alcohol going to the pub is a pretty rubbish option.
- Find new friends – where do you find friends as an adult who doesn’t go to a workplace or the pub? Slimming world has been my sanctuary for this 🙂
- Exercise, I was always a gym bunny and love a damn good workout. My favourite thing was always spinning but that’s not an option now (for a while longer but I will get it back) any other form of exercise is a great thing to get into though and it’s generally my fall back, walking and yoga
- Family, I know this is number 11 but I LOVE my family and I am so lucky. My grandchildren are my mental lifesavers, I’ve said this a hundred times and I’ll say it a hundred times more, when the adults around me were physically saving my life, my grandchildren mentally did it, they made me laugh on the days when I didn’t think there was any laughter left
- Be kind, whether that’s to myself by not giving myself a hard time for eating a whole packet of biscuits or just giving a hot cuppa to a stranger who you know has nowhere else to go, kindness gives me a glow, a feeling of satisfaction, not selfish self satisfaction but just a feeling of goodness
- Gardening, I am absolutely definitely not a gardener, I’d love to be but my home has always been a plant graveyard, they just come to me to die. But I love a garden, the beautiful colours and smells and knowing that new life is growing in a good garden is great. Knowing that you can create new life and do that with your own hands must be an amazing feeling
- Work, yes yes yes I know this is a mad one but I really do love working, I always did, I didn’t always love my jobs but I did always love working. It’s another satisfying feeling, especially when I worked in jobs that gave people joy and happiness. I hope this new chapter will give people peace and calm
So all in all it seems that as I’m writing this I do better than I give myself credit for, apart from the baking and the gardening I really do most of these things. I think I just need to count my lucky stars a little bit more often and that also means don’t let people piss me off and on that note it is time for me to get into my pyjamas, curl up on the sofa for an hour with a cuppa and a good book and maybe a piece of cake 🙂
I am very aware of my failings and I am very aware that I have high expectations of myself and this transfers onto those around me, my high expectations has lost me friendships that I’ve walked away from. I keep a small group of friends around me and they know this of me, sometimes they are brave enough to tell me to shut up/wind my neck in and force me to see a different perspective, these are the ones who I am lucky enough to keep closest
Before I sign off though I owe a MASSIVE thankyou to those people around me, whether you’re close to me or virtual I am so grateful for the help you give me, for the posting and reposting of my website and new facebook page, for the support, laughs, knowledge and shoulders. I hope that one day in the not too distant future, a get together can be put together for all the virtual friends I have made and I am just about always free to drink coffee, eat cake and go for walks or laugh on the phone for hours with those close to me Thankyou, all of you 🙂
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