It’s a weird time of the year for those of us who feel sorry for ourselves isn’t is? I know there will be a million or so blogs being written right now by people who look back and lament on the misery they have had and honestly it would be so easy for me to do that and considering my terrible memory to think back over the fabulous times I’ve had this year but that’s exactly what I’m going to do.

I celebrated last new year with my grandson, as we curled up watching Star Wars movies, this year I am going to a party.

I’ve made amazing new friends this year and coupled with my friends I’ve had for years and years, I am extraordinarily lucky.

I’ve enjoyed a house move, beach days, a brilliant birthday BBQ, setting up my new business which in 2019 will be totally focused on. I’ve travelled less but the places I’ve been to I’ve wanted to go to for years and had amazing times with amazing people and that has given me amazing memories (even if some days I have to go through my photos to remember them, but when I do go through photos I do remember them). I have managed to squash in great theatre trips, the circus, great visits to friends and laughter, lots and lots of laughter. As I type this, I have just come home from the ballet, watching the Bolshoi ballet dance the nutcracker, I’ve wanted to watch it forever and it was as incredibly beautiful as I dreamed it would be, despite not understanding any of it, I giggled to myself that I didn’t really understand what was going on but it was beautiful.

My hair has grown brilliantly, when I think this time last year I took a set of hair clippers to my head and cut off all of what was left of my hair, I remember everyone saying how great it looked but actually it really looked bloody awful, so awful that I could barely look at myself in the mirror, I looked like a cancer patient (sorry cancer patients) now it really is looking better, stronger, thicker and healthier and curly, I haven’t had curly hair since I was 3, well except for that curly perm I conflicted on myself in the 80’s, my only defence was that everyone else had it! I do now have that bit of confidence back.

I’ve learned new skills and stuff I never knew I didn’t know about health, diet, medication and mindfulness. I’ve raised money for charity and danced with a wookie, lost the weight I’ve wanted to lose for YEARS, and had a dawning realisation that I have the ability to be a spiteful cow at times. With that in mind I have made a LOT of apologies, luckily a lot of those I’ve been really bitchy to have become amazing friends and have accepted my apologies with grace, whether I’ve deserved that or not I am grateful for it. I’ve learned to be kinder, to look beyond people and the way they behave, you never know what is really going on in someone elses life. I’m still learning that when someone is behaving like an idiot there may well be a reason for it. I’ve also bought lots of cuppas for strangers, someone sitting in the cold because they have nowhere else to go, a young Mum with a crying child that looks like she didn’t know what to do, we went for a cuppa, we had a chat, the child got a cake and stopped crying and I made a short term friend from a stranger, she probably thought I was bonkers but it helped her that afternoon I hope.

I am looking forward to a fabulous Christmas with my amazing daughters, their other halves and the grandchildren. I am looking forward to the laughter and happiness that comes with Christmas and I have always loved Christmas.

Life is a funny old thing, easy to moan about and at times difficult to grasp, but I will grasp it again with both hands and whatever the future and my broken brain has in store for me, I will keep laughing, keep smiling and keep working at it. So if I get in your nerves, I’m sort of sorry but you will just have to either smile with me or deal with it. I love life, I never wanted a new one but this new one is to be enjoyed so enjoy it I will.

Merry Christmas folks, I wish you happiness and good health.